I have been, I have seen and I was super bored. Nicco Park, aka the "Disney Land" of West Bengal, was empty. It was spirit crushingly empty. I have some pictures, they will be posted. Somewhere. At least the carneys at this one were energetic. Nothing is creepier than a carney who just leans/stands there and stares at you. So I went on some rides, I thought I was going to die. Many, many times.

First ride: tilt-a-whirl
Yeah, the lapbar sure didn't ever lock. That was a rather poor beginning, but hey, its the tilta whirl. We're not talking about some kind of high speed, high danger ride here.

Second ride: the awful
I don't actually know what its name is, but, well, yeah. See the name. It just went around in a circle about 20 feet in the air. It was also a monorail. So the whole time I'm on this thing, I'm asking God what I did to deserve to feel like death was approaching at every rattle and turn. Then the dude wouldn't let me off, so I had to go again. Awful

Then the coaster. It was called the cyclone. There was a seat belt and a lapbar. Of course the seatbelt was busted. But hey, at least the lapbar worked. Then I went on some other wildly forgettable rides and went back to the cyclone for one more go before I left. Again, the seat belt did not work. But the new twist? The lapbar also didn't work. Luckily this damnable ride had no loops, or I would have fallen out. But hey, at least my heartrate was through the roof.

Then I walked home. Then I felt real stupid for doing that. Yay for blisters and not being able to breath. Thanks, pollution. Did I mention its heavily polluted here? Well, it certainly is. Just horrid.

Saturday night, I'm sitting around and I made an important decision. I've had enough of attempting to enjoy or even sample the local culture. I'm gonna be an awful tourist from here on out. I'm going to be surly, and bemoan my lack of beef. Because you know what? Chicken, lamb or a BELL FUCKING PEPPER should not be my only options for the BURGER part of a hamburger. So fuck it. I'm gonna eat at the coffee shop I hate because it has somewhat American food. And I'm gonna drink my coke, and I'm give this place the finger for a week.

Let's just say, I've had better trips.

And yes, I'm still having, "issues", with my poop.

I can't wait until friday. But at least I had a horrible adventure for all you readers at home. You bastards and your clean water, and your breathable air. Just, go suck a lemon or something.
- posted by Pat @ 5:53 AM